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CHINA BLOCKS U.S. WARSHIP, LANDS ON MOON
On Friday US officials said that on December 5, a Chinese naval vessel crossed directly in front of the guided missile warship USS Cowpens and halted, forcing the American ship to maneuver in order to avoid a collision. According to Dean Cheng of the Heritage Foundation, the event was a symbolic display of Chinese military might and “a deliberate effort to intimidate” American vessels cruising the South China Sea.

On Saturday China successfully landed an unmanned space probe on the moon, the first such soft landing since a Soviet mission in 1976. It is thought that China’s space program will reach parity with, or possibly eclipse, that of the United States within a decade or two.

NORTH KOREA: DEATH PENALTY FOR “DREAMING DIFFERENT DREAMS”
The uncle of North Korean potentate Kim Jong-un”€”call him Kim Jong-uncle if you must”€”was executed on Thursday according to the state news wire. The official statement described Jang Song Thaek as “despicable human scum…who was worse than a dog,” presumably because he was inedible. Among other crimes, the allegedly treacherous and traitorous uncle had been arrested for “dreaming different dreams.” He is thought to have been executed by machine gun.

This follows on the heels of last summer’s execution of a dozen or more members of the Unhasu Orchestra, one of whom was thought to have been Kim’s ex-girlfriend and a romantic rival to his wife. The chubby-cheeked dictator still has a long way to go to match his father’s slaughter of what South Korean sources estimate to be a million perceived dissidents in 2001’s “march to progress.” Historian R. J. Rummel, an expert on government-sponsored murder, estimates that Kim’s grandfather Kim Il-sung killed as many as 3.5 million of his countrymen from 1948 to 1994. The march to progress continues.

TILA TEQUILA NAMES THE JEW
A year ago, reality TV star, porn actress, and part-time rapper Tila Tequila, who is mostly of Vietnamese descent, announced she was converting to Judaism. Last week, she posted a picture of herself dressed in Nazi regalia and standing athwart train tracks leading to Auschwitz. She claimed that Hitler was misunderstood and criticized Jews for “refusing to forgive and forget.” She also complained that Zionists had repeatedly banned her from Facebook. Ms. Tequila condemned “New World Order Zionists” as well as “Rothschild Bankers” and even recorded a rap track that rhymed the words “Yahtzee” and “Nazi.”

SEXUAL HARASSMENT AND GUN VIOLENCE IN COLORADO’S CLASSROOMS
On Friday afternoon, 18-year-old Karl Pierson, who allegedly described himself as a “Keynesian” who was highly critical of Republicans, entered a high school near Denver and shot two students before fatally shooting himself.

On Wednesday it was reported that a six-year-old Colorado boy was suspended from class on grounds of sexual harassment for kissing a female student on the hand.

JUDGE NOT, LEST YE PASS STUPID VERDICTS
A study by the California State University at Northridge examining 516 discrimination suits over eight years concluded that black federal judges are nearly 160% likelier to sympathize with black litigants in discrimination cases than are white judges. The study found no difference between white and black judges when the claimants weren’t black.

Retired Brooklyn Judge Frank Barbaro now says he was motivated by “reverse racism” when he convicted a white man, Donald Kagan, of murder for shooting 22-year-old black man Wavell Wint in 1998 during a struggle over Kagan’s gold chain necklace. “I believe now that I was seeing this young white fellow as a bigot, as someone who assassinated an African-American,” Barbaro told Brooklyn Supreme Court Justice ShawnDya Simpson (ahem) in court. “The question of discrimination against African-American people became part of my fiber”€”my very fiber.” The court must now consider whether Kagan should be acquitted, retried, or released and credited with time served.

A Texas judge gave sixteen-year-old Ethan Couch only 10 years of probation after a drunk-driving accident in which four people were killed and two others paralyzed. Although a minor, Couch’s blood-alcohol level was measured at three times the legal limit for adults, which doesn’t count the Valium coursing through his veins during the fatal accident. Couch had been previously cited for alcohol violations in February. Although Couch had been drinking for hours on the day of the crash, was allegedly involved in stealing two cases of beer from a local Walmart, was driving 70MPH in a 40MPH zone, and slammed into a group of Good Samaritans at roadside so hard that they were reportedly hurled sixty yards into the air, the judge ruled that Couch’s wealthy upbringing had spoiled him so much, he had a diminished sense of responsibility for his actions. Defense psychologists had successfully argued that Couch suffers from a mental condition known as “affluenza.”