After combing through the data for hours, academics have discovered the cause of the mass shooting in Charleston. Turns out it was comedian Amy Schumer’s fault. You see, she once joked, "I used to date Hispanic guys, but now I prefer consensual," and that led to a climate of racism ...
Geraldo and Ann Coulter recently had a debate about immigration that was fun to watch, but Washington Heights came up as an example of "immigrant vitality." It was wedged in with a bunch of other predominantly Hispanic communities and it sounded good in an argument, but I live in New York ...
The American flag is a symbol of Native American genocide. We need to take it down. While you"re at it, take down the Union Jack. It symbolizes 700 years of war against Scotland. The Kiss logo has an SS that looks like Hitler's SS. That's offensive to all the Holocaust survivors in the ...
An Asian dude walks into a bar. "Pour me a jigger, nigger," he says to the black bartender. "Come on, man," the bartender responds, "that's not cool." The Asian ain"t havin" it. "Oh, fuck off," he says indignantly, motioning for his drink. The bartender ...
I rarely read comments, but someone recently sent me this one from David Brooks" op-ed "The Campus Crusaders." Anne from New York City wrote: It's not trauma; it's narcissism. I am a psychotherapist. Real trauma survivors typically seek to avoid talking about their traumas and often ...
In the article that shut down my life, "Transphobia Is Perfectly Natural," I likened sex-change surgery to self-mutilation. As the mob chased me through the village with their torches, I yelled back, "They have BIID!" (body integrity identity disorder), referring to nutbars who have ...
Ann Coulter is a withered old hag who uses shock value to sell books. Look at her face. What is she, 40? And her hair? Come on. Are we supposed to take this "woman" seriously? Her latest incarnation of Mein Kampf says Adios, America on the front but should really be called Mexicans Are ...
Abolish prison and give everyone a gun. The end. Good night. Oh wait, that's not enough for a column? Okay, how about legalize drugs too? I"m not kidding. I know it sounds outrageous but hate facts often are. Look, I"m not suggesting we send all the guards home and open up the gates ...
So, I"m walking along the East River the other day and I see this twenty-something couple sitting on a bench, reading old-timey books. I was surprised by my own reaction which was, "Ew." Then I realized, people between the ages of 20 and 25 should not read books. Their brain isn"t ...
If you ever need to be reminded how superior the West is, just hop in a taxi. The drivers come from anywhere-but-here and pretty much all of them are ambassadors of suck. The days of the charming, loudmouth cabbie with the cigar stub and rude jokes have been replaced with rude jerks from Pakistan, ...
