The Week's Most Atomic, Islamic, and Tragicomic Headlines UGLY MUSLIM WOMAN: "I DON"T DATE WHITE MEN" Last Friday evening in France, Islamic extremists"some of whom are thought to have been among this year’s tidal wave of Syrian refugees to Europe"slaughtered at least ...
The Week's Most Ruthless, Truthless, and Toothless Headlines TWO BLACK LOUISIANA COPS CHARGED WITH MURDER IN SHOOTING DEATH OF SIX-YEAR-OLD WHITE BOY According to the Washington Post, last week a six-year-old white boy from Louisiana became the youngest victim of 834 fatal shootings by law ...
The Week's Most Fascinating, Lacerating, and Exasperating Headlines KILLING BABY HITLER Simply because The New York Times was, is, and always will be the most respected and trustworthy publication in the solar system, it recently asked its readers what is undoubtedly the most pressing question of ...
The Week's Dumbest, Numbest, and Glummest Headlines BIBI ABSOLVES ADOLF Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, who just so happens to be Jewish, sparked a thunderous outcry of digital “oy, gevalts” last week when he claimed that Adolf Hitler merely wanted to expel Jews from Germany ...
The Week's Dreamiest, Steamiest, and Seamiest Headlines M.L.K. RETURNS TO THE MOUNTAINTOP The Right Reverend Holy Martin Lucifer King is a huge inspiration to rainbow-colored children across this great planet, and the fact that he was a plagiarist and a communist and a prostitute-basher and had ...
The Week's Most Timeless, Mindless, and Spineless Headlines JUSTICE...OR ELSE WHAT? The Honorable Righteous Bean-Pie-Slingin’ Minister Louis Farrakhan"who helms an organization that preaches white people were created by an evil scientist and will be annihilated by a giant flying saucer ...
The Week's Most Fabled, Mislabeled, and Transabled Headlines NYC HONORS ETHEL ROSENBERG Ethel Rosenberg, who along with her husband Julius formed America’s Most Hated Couple in the early 1950s, was executed in 1953 after a conviction for sharing atomic secrets with the Soviet Union. Both ...
The Week's Most Fumbling, Bumbling, and Stumbling Headlines NORMALIZING PEDOPHILIA After the Supreme Court normalized gay marriage in June, many predicted that it wouldn’t take long before leftists began slippin’ and slidin’ and slalomin’ down that seedy, slimy slope from ...
The Week's Most Dissonant, Insolent, and Ignorant Headlines ACTOR MATT DAMON CHASTISED FOR NOT REALIZING THAT HIS WHITENESS IS PROBLEMATIC Actor Matt Damon is best known for being the exceedingly liberal and highly articulate sidekick of actor Ben Affleck, who is widely acknowledged as the ...
The Week's Most Acidic, Hasidic, and Anti-Semitic Headlines EUROPE LOVES ITS NEW REFUGEES! As CNN and USA Today tell the story, the citizens of Europe erupted on Saturday in an ebullient, warm, kindhearted, and accepting mass celebration of the dusky hordes who have been spilling onto their ...
