The Week’s Most Contentious, Pretentious, and Sententious Headlines INTERSECTIONAL SQUABBLING AT THE OSCARS This year’s Academy Awards ceremony"cohosted by Ellen Degeneres, Karl Marx, and Herbert Marcuse"was the most aggressively PC such event in history. However, the ...
The Week’s Most Defamatory, Declamatory, and Derogatory Headlines PUTIN PULLS A POWER MOVE Fasten your seat belts and take your heart pills, because we may be on the brink of World War III. Late last week, “men in military uniform without national insignia” were spotted at an ...
The Week’s Most Political, Hypocritical, and Sodomitical Headlines WILD IN THE STREETS Police and antigovernment protesters clashed on streets across the globe last week. In all instances except one, the police emerged victorious. Violence continued in Venezuela in protests that so far ...
The Week's Most Reactive, Unattractive, and Putrefactive Headlines SOUTHERN WORKERS TELL UNION: "DROP DEAD" The American labor movement"or whatever's left of it"was dealt a knee to the groin last Friday when workers at a Tennessee Volkswagen plant voted 712-626 against allowing ...
The Week's Most Dumb, Glum, and Ho-Hum Headlines OLYMPIAN CONTROVERSIES The Sochi Winter Olympics are underway, and in a world where nothing is apolitical anymore, luges and ice skates are being shoved aside to make way for political controversies of every conceivable stripe. For far too many ...
The Week's Most Contemptible, Reprehensible, and Indefensible Headlines ATLANTA's TRAFFIC NIGHTMARE: BLAME THE SNOW BECAUSE IT's WHITE Atlanta"a city of barely a half-million people in a metro area more than ten times that size"was crippled last Tuesday by a monstrous winter snowstorm that ...
The Week's Most Semitic, Parasitic, and Sodomitic Headlines RICHARD SHERMAN's "I HAVE A SCREAM" SPEECH Martin Luther King Day came and went last Monday. Some missed the civil-rights icon, while others only missed their mail. The 900+ streets named in MLK's honor nationwide are "black ...
The Week’s Most Demonic, Hedonic, and Ebonic Headlines MARTIN LUTHER KING DIED SO YOU CAN TWERK The majority-black city of Flint, MI"rated America’s most dangerous metropolitan area"recently faced yet more opprobrium due to a flyer announcing a “Freedom 2 Twerk” ...
The Week’s Most Malicious, Suspicious, and Injudicious Headlines THE LION (OF ISRAEL) SLEEPS TONIGHT After being in a coma that lasted longer than the Holocaust, former Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon (born Ariel Scheinermann) has departed the Holy Land for points unknown. Referred to ...
The Week’s Most Vicious, Pernicious, and Seditious Headlines RINGING IN THE NEW YEAR WITH A BANG Citizens across our wide and bounteously diverse globe celebrated the New Year’s dawning with new hopes, new dreams, and new resolutions. Celebrations transpired joyously and peacefully, ...