The Week's Most Conspiratorial, Dictatorial, and Accusatorial Headlines MEXICAN NEWSPAPER: WE NEED TO BUILD A WALL A newspaper in that wondrously vibrant, spicy, technologically challenged, and intellectually deprived nation directly south of the USA has declared that Mexico needs a border ...
The Week’s Most Pathetic, Splenetic, and Phrenetic Headlines HILLARY CLINTON: STILL NOT SICK In order to silence the endlessly paranoid conspiracy theories spawned like demon seedlings from the right-wing fever swamps that have been insisting without any evidence that Hillary Clinton may be ...
The Week's Most Seductive, Instructive, and Counterproductive Headlines NIGEL FARAGE BOARDS THE TRUMP TRAIN Nigel “Mr. Brexit” Farage joined Donald “Our Lord and Savior” Trump last Wednesday evening before a roaring crowd of 15,000 or Trumpeteers in Jackson, MS. ...
The Week's Most Haughty, Bawdy, and Tawdry Headlines GEORGE SOROS AND THE “NEW NORMAL” Multibillionaire currency manipulator and culture destroyer George Soros was hatched from a dinosaur egg in Hungary in 1930. It’s a little known fact that he was spawned as a result of a ...
The Week's Scariest, Wariest, and Hairiest Headlines PERSONS OF COLOR SEEK ROOMMATE: WHITES NEED NOT APPLY The wondrous and clean-smelling progress we’ve made as a nation ever since the cool and groovy Civil Rights movement of the 1960s kicked into gear has now come full circle. Whereas ...
The Week's Most Morose, Bellicose, and Grandiose Headlines CLINT EASTWOOD: "WE"RE REALLY IN A PUSSY GENERATION" In an interview with Esquire magazine, eighty-six-year-old film legend Clint “Make My Day” Eastwood opined that a Hillary Clinton presidency would give Americans ...
The Week's Most Pugnacious, Rapacious, and Ungracious Headlines DNC IN PHILLY: WHITE PEOPLE TO THE BACK OF THE BUS Last week in the city where Mumia Abu-Jamal became a global celebrity for killing a white cop, the Democratic Party officially nominated suspected lesbian Hillary Clinton as their ...
The Week's Most Spiteful, Frightful, and Inciteful Headlines CRUNCHING THE NUMBERS ON POLICE SHOOTINGS While America burns due to misguided rage inflamed by the myth that trigger-happy white cops are gunning down innocent black males as if they were bloodthirsty safari hunters poaching gentle ...
The Week's Most Laborious, Inglorious, and Injurious Headlines PLAYING POKÃMON AT AUSCHWITZ Since its release on July 6, the addictive mobile phone game Pokémon Go has seen such enormous success that it already gets more traffic than Facebook, Snapchat, and Twitter. But with every massive ...
The Week's Most Accidental, Occidental, and Detrimental Headlines IS DONALD TRUMP A JEW-HATIN’, JEW-BAITIN’, ANTI-SEMITIC MONSTER? Last weekend when Americans were enjoying their Independence Day festivities by eating watermelon and corn on the cob with family and friends, most of the ...
