“€¢ A number of Internet forums host handwringing conversations about “masculinity,” another word the left has domesticated and castrated so that it now means the opposite of its original definition. The first such site I ever encountered was The League of Ordinary Gentlemen, but the upstart Good Men Project throws off so little testosterone, it makes the League look like the gladiator holding pen beneath the Roman Coliseum.

Behold “5 Ways Disavowing Masculinity Changed My Life,” in which one Richard Reece admits that he now “sits down to pee” and “wears women’s clothing accessories.”

“€¢ Which brings us to author Buzz Bissinger’s gut-curdling confession in GQ that he blew over a half-million of his Friday Night Lights money on clothes. And by “clothes” he means, among many other items, a pair of $5,600 leather pants and some thigh-high boots with six-inch stiletto heels.

The 58-year-old married father of three says he “began to seek sexual expression in the form of high fashion” and discovered that “Tom Ford makeup is divine.”

Yes, I know: Complaints about creeping effeminacy are as old as ancient Greece and Rome”€”both of which are extinct. But what brought on this latest epidemic?

For some right-wingers, the hormones excreted by birth-control-pill-taking females have replaced fluoride as the waterborne toxin endangering our “precious bodily fluids,” but the scientific jury is still out on that one. And besides, beta males only drink bottled H₂O.

Whatever the reason, the rest of us are doomed to reside in a dystopian alternate universe in which the 98-pound weakling is the beau ideal and Charles Atlas shrugged.