Theodore Kaczynski, 1968.

Source: George Bergman

When exactly is the Unabomber’s funeral? Nobody knows, because, as The Babylon Bee recently put it, no one dared open any of the postal invitations.

The death by apparent suicide of America’s favorite (pre-Islamist era) bearded mad mail-bomber Theodore “Ted” Kaczynski in his prison cell in June caused the media to eagerly recap all possible angles on his case—apart from one. What most journalists failed miserably to mention was that Ted was at one point in his life really a bearded lady, like one of those you used to find in the circus, but now find openly masturbating in women’s changing rooms.

Bulging Male-Box
During his youth, Teddy Boy suffered a bout of what we would now term “gender dysphoria” and seriously considered undergoing a full-blown sex-change operation. Yet this interesting factoid was conveniently passed over by most mainstream media obituaries of the criminal—very odd, given these same outlets usually fall over themselves in their eagerness to report positively on the achievements of any and all other figures on the trans spectrum, under the relentlessly celebratory rubric of “elevating previously marginalized voices.”

When it came to the Unabomber, however, this situation found itself strangely reversed, and a conspiracy of polite silence appeared to prevail—but surely “silence is violence”? This was a cover-up every bit as bad as that of the online rumor mill FACT that Ted and his fellow eco-loony Greta Thunberg were long-term pen pals, perhaps leading up to an ultimate behind-bars wedding: Ted loves Greta till the end of the world.

Leading gay media outlet Pink News, for example, criticized any linkage being made by dissident social media critics between the Unabomber’s crimes and his one-time transgender leanings by reprinting a litany of online counter-comments such as the following: “The problem isn’t that Ted Kaczysnki was/might have been trans. The problem is that…[online critics are] clearly trying to make some kind of connection between Ted’s gender distress and [his] being the Unabomber.”

But the problem with this line of argument is that Kaczynski’s “gender distress” was directly linked to him being the Unabomber!

Return to Bender
Back in those far, far-off days of 1998, when even The Washington Post still knew what made a man into a man and a woman into woman (i.e., the content not of their characters, but of their underwear, as a genital-inspecting Martin Luther King might have put it), the publication ran a report about a mental evaluation made of the mail-bomb murderer by a federal psychiatrist named Sally Johnson. The opening paragraph of the Post story detailed in plain terms the simple facts of the case in a fashion the very same newspaper would perhaps not be quite so honest to do today:

Convicted Unabomber Theodore J. Kaczynski considered having a sex change operation when he was in his twenties and his confusion over his gender identity filled him with a rage that contributed to his bombing spree, according to documents released today.

That sounds pretty clear and unambiguous to me. Or was this just typically misleading transphobic media hyperbole of the day? Well, Sally Johnson’s psychiatric report itself is easily available online, the relevant passage of which, discussing Kaczynski’s abortive mid-20s attempt at undergoing a full-blown surgical sex-change operation whilst still at college, reads thus:

…he describes experiencing a period of several weeks where he was sexually excited nearly all the time and was fantasizing himself as a woman and being unable to obtain any sexual relief…. When he returned to the University of Michigan he made an appointment to see a psychiatrist to be examined to determine if [a] sex change would be good for him. He claimed that by putting on an act he could con the psychiatrist into thinking him suitable for a feminine role even though his motive was exclusively erotic. As he was sitting in the waiting room, he turned completely against the idea of the operation and thus, when he saw the doctor, instead claimed he was depressed…. He describes the following, “As I walked away from the building afterwards, I felt disgusted about what my uncontrolled sexual cravings had almost led me to do and I felt humiliated, and I violently hated the psychiatrist. Just then there came a major turning point in my life. Like a Phoenix, I burst from the ashes of my despair to a glorious new hope. I thought I wanted to kill that psychiatrist because the future looked utterly empty to me. I felt I wouldn’t care if I died. And so I said to myself why not really kill the psychiatrist and anyone else whom I hate. What is important is not the words that ran through my mind but the way I felt about them. What was entirely new was the fact that I really felt I could kill someone. My very hopelessness had liberated me because I no longer cared about death. I no longer cared about consequences and I said to myself that I really could break out of my rut in life and do things that were daring, irresponsible or criminal.”

To be clear, the Unabomber’s main motivations for his later bombing spree were primarily anti-technological in nature: “The Industrial Revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race,” as the first line of his 1995 justificatory manifesto famously goes. But, if the words from out of his own murderous mouth are to be believed, Kaczynski’s first specific impulse to slaughter his fellow human beings arose directly from his youthful transgenderist (or autogynephiliac, if you want to be all technical about it) leanings.

In other words, then, despite Pink News’ protests to the contrary, “Uncle Ted,” as his many online fans know him (surely “Auntie Ted”?), did indeed possess demonstrable one-time transgender leanings, and these did indeed directly inspire him to kill.

Please, Mr. Post-Op Man
So why haven’t the mainstream media let the Great American Public know about this? As the United States’ all-time leading bomb-through-the-mail killer, surely Theodore J. Kaczynski stands as a prime example of a historically significant trans high-achiever of the exact same kind all our children should now know about and be taught to revere in school, like Elizabeth I, Gay Edgar Hoover, the Brönte Brothers, or John of Arc?

No, because that’s not how it works. From henceforth, all transgenderists must forever be painted in a wholly positive light as benign role models to be emulated, and, being a mass murderer, Kaczynski does not quite fit the required mold. Plus, there is the awkward fact that, in his 1995 manifesto, Ted gives an amusingly accurate—and quite withering—assessment of the inbuilt personality flaws of the typical postwar American leftist. “If our society had no social problems at all, the leftists would have to INVENT problems in order to provide themselves with an excuse for making a fuss,” he wrote at one point.

They’re doing that now already, Ted; it’s called the “trans genocide,” and it’s about every bit as “real” as your own fallopian tubes. Indeed, awkward online mentions about Kaczynski’s transgender inclinations have already been hyperbolically referenced by some critical outlets as having the potential to stoke a tranny-terrifying “Anti-Trans Rhetoric Wave.” That’s right, the true violence here was not Ted’s at all, but that of people who “irresponsibly” feel the urge to peddle facts to the public rather than the usual diet of obfuscatory lies by maliciously posting links to the 1998 Washington Post story on their Twitter feeds.

Parceling Out Blame
This seems to be the general tactic of the transgender left today: Whenever one of their own number commits a crime, they immediately reverse the situation so that they suddenly become the true victims, rather than the perpetrators, as is in fact the case.

Consider Audrey Hale, the wannabe-male transgender shooter who infamously shot up her old Christian school in Nashville back in March, for reasons allegedly “unknown” (re: politically inconvenient).

Immediately following the atrocity, an organization calling itself the Trans Resistance Network (TNC) issued a press release claiming the “incident” was “not one tragedy, but two.” The first tragedy, of course, was that several people were shot and killed by a cross-dressing lunatic. The second and far greater tragedy, however, was that the cross-dressing lunatic in question “had no other effective way to be seen than to lash out by taking the life of others, and by consequence, himself [sic].”

But if Hale was “forced into” her actions by virtue of having “no other effective way to be seen” than to shoot several innocent children and adults dead, and trans voices are always supposed to be elevated and amplified by society at large in order to avoid this tear-jerking situation arising in the first place, then why has her own heartfelt and lengthy manifesto still not been released to the public? Perhaps it is because, by comparison, it makes Ted Kaczynski’s own deadly political screed look like the work of a sane person.

Postman Patronizing
Again, the main reason Auntie Ted mailed out bombs was to bring down modern technology, his chosen targets being engineers, computer vendors, etc., not so-called TERFs. But if propagandists today are so keen to portray the only thing worth knowing about significant past figures like Jeanne d’Arc is that they were allegedly trans, then isn’t it double standards not to do the same with meritless but historically noteworthy wrong ’uns like Kaczynski too?

That Transgender Ted died during annual Gay Pride Month is surely a heaven-sent gift horse not to be looked in the mouth: Fresh from draping the White House all over in rainbow flags this June, shouldn’t President Biden now grant the Unabummer a full state funeral, his coffin draped in another such multicolored gaybow banner of mourning likewise? Those incredibly dignified trannies with their tits out Joe so kindly allowed to cavort on the White House lawn with him last month could be the pallbearers.

After all, to do otherwise would surely just be to collude in covering up the line pushed in all other circumstances by today’s gay groups that “trans people have always been with us”—and doing something like that may have severe consequences. Why, it might almost be enough to push a mentally unbalanced person with a delusional grudge against wider American society into acts of outright violent terrorism…