And my generation needs to fight every urge to blame false demons for our cultural bankruptcy. Kim Kardashian is famous because we yearn for her entitled life. Justin Bieber is The Monkees who sings his own songs. And Twilight is The Little Mermaid.

To win this battle is simple, yet difficult. The simple part is coming to terms with our free will by stating these three words: “I am responsible.” It’s melodramatic to say these words out loud, but when dodgeball is at stake, we cannot take any chances. The difficult part is meaning it, thereby coming to terms with the fact that our every whine, bitch, and moan is of our own doing. The shame diminishes when we realize a bruised self-image is healthier than keeping our thumbs up our asses.

Like any war, Gen Y’s battle for reality will have its casualties. Some of us will have to bite our lips and keep our problems to ourselves. Previous generations called this “pleasant conversation.”

If Gen Y isn’t ready to focus our lens of blame and criticism on ourselves, we can at least turn off Glee and play a game of dodgeball—just so long as the winners win, the losers lose, and nobody gets a participation award.