June 02, 2016
Dat Boi
Can you imagine the reaction of black leaders and activists if whites began to claim that African chattel slavery harmed them, too? In fact, whites aren”t even allowed to commemorate the actual history of white (especially Irish and Slavic) slavery. How dare you co-opt our suffering, yell the blacks. But we Jews want whites and Christians to co-opt our suffering. We invite it. To us it just makes sense. And you can”t argue with success; it’s been a very good strategy.
Look, I”m not trying to pen some kind of Maurice Samuel You Gentiles confessional here. I”m merely trying to point out that “appropriation” always goes both ways (minority groups adopt elements from the dominant population, and vice versa), and minority groups are better served by welcoming the process and using it to their advantage, as opposed to hectoring the majority for every small instance of supposed “theft.” That which is “holy” to a minority group, be it cutting off penis tips or letting hair harden to a filthy nap, is not lessened in its sacredness by the fact that others do it. If you”re comfortable with your own identity, “appropriation” shouldn”t bother you. Of course, as Dolemite cannily pointed out so long ago, some people are just “born-insecure mutherfuckers.”
After last week’s column about Ronald Reagan yelling at black people, I found myself having to remind a liberal white friend from New Brunswick (black population: 0.7%, eh?) that black people are not a novelty to me. They”re not theoretical, they”re not an abstract. I”ve always lived in areas that have a large black population, and as a child and teen I attended majority-black public schools. This “cultural appropriation” nonsense is part of a long-standing argument I”ve had with my black friends, going back decades. In the “90s, when the FUBU (“for us by us”) craze was at its peak, I continually pointed out to my friends that the black community in the U.S. is not large or centralized enough for FUBU to be a viable long-term economic strategy. The Jewish approach of “BUFY” (“by us for you”) is a hell of a lot better. And quite a few black entrepreneurs understood that. When suburban white kids started embracing hip-hop culture”not just the music but the clothing, the style, and the lexicon”it was a very positive thing for the black community, though not everyone realized it. In fact, I”d suggest that the hip-hop crossover craze of the late “80s and “90s couldn”t happen today. It would be scuttled by SJWs screeching about “cultural appropriation.”
The truth is, the black community has always been held back by ninnies who think sharing means genocide. Dusty Fletcher should be a household name. By all rights, he should be memorialized in the annals of comedy as the first American comedian to achieve superstar status via a catchphrase. Decades before “Well, excuuuuuse me!” and “Nanu-nanu” and “Sock it to me,” before even “Who’s on first?” and “Say goodnight, Gracie,” Dusty Fletcher, a black vaudevillian from the “Chitlin” Circuit,” achieved proto-meme status with his catchphrase “Open the door, Richard!” The line was from his signature routine: A drunk stumbles home to his flophouse. Having misplaced his key, he repeatedly yells for his roommate Richard to open the door for him, but Richard never responds (and yes, “Dave’s not here” is supposed to have been directly influenced by Fletcher’s skit).
Fletcher proved that Americans have a voracious (and color-blind) appetite for catchphrase comedy. “Open the door, Richard!” became not only a comedy phenomenon, but a musical one as well, with artists like Count Basie, Jack McVea, and Louis Jordan (as well as Fletcher himself) putting the routine to music. “Open the door, Richard!””as a routine, a catchphrase, and a song”was a massive crossover hit. So of course the NAACP complained, on the grounds that whites were enjoying something performed in the “black vernacular.” As long as only blacks were laughing at Fletcher, it was fine. But when whites found the exact same thing funny, it became a genocidal atrocity. The NAACP protested Fletcher’s popularity, demanding that the poor bastard be sent straight to the underside of the bus. Dusty Fletcher’s legacy was lost, but what was won? Nothing, other than the ability to say, “We took our ball and went home.”
Dusty Fletcher was a great comedian, whereas Dat Boi is just a stupid meme. But the mentality of the censors is the same. Why seek to influence the culture when you can retreat to your own little North Pole to reign as emperor? It’s depressing to think that this self-defeating mind-set is not only still lurking within the black community, but growing in acceptance.
Such a shanda it is. You want I should give my opinion? I think maybe those black “leaders” are gornisht helfn. That’s “beyond help,” for those of you who”d like to expand your Yiddish vocabulary. And please”do so with my blessing. Usurp away, my goyishe friends. Far from feeling threatened by it, we Jews consider appropriation the sincerest form of flattery.
