United States-Mexico border wall in Progreso Lakes, Texas.

Source: Wikimedia Commons

The Week’s Most Conspiratorial, Dictatorial, and Accusatorial Headlines

MEXICAN NEWSPAPER: WE NEED TO BUILD A WALL
A newspaper in that wondrously vibrant, spicy, technologically challenged, and intellectually deprived nation directly south of the USA has declared that Mexico needs a border wall”€”on its southern border.

“Yes to the Border Wall…but in Mexico’s South,” bellows the headline by the editorial board of El Mañana, a prominent paper in the Mexican border state of Tamaulipas:

Trump’s idea of a border wall is a good one but it should be on the southern border with Central America in order to stop the flow of Central Americans from entering both countries….Many of these migrants when they are unable to find an honest way of life turn to robberies, kidnappings, extortion, and in the worst cases join the ranks of organized crime.

According to The Financial Times, America has already sent $75 million to Mexico to aid in the crackdown on immigrants on its southern border.

Meanwhile, in the avidly ethnomasochistic nation on America’s northern border, a male student at Calgary’s Mount Royal University had his red “Make America Great Again” hat forcibly removed by an unidentified beta male after a verbal altercation in which a female student berated the hat-wearer for spreading “hate language.”

A video shows student Matt Linder receiving a stern dressing-down from Zoe Slusar, former vice president of the university’s student life program. “You have to take it off,” Slusar commands Linder as the video begins:

You”€™re not allowed to share hate language at a university…‘Make America Great Again’ means make America all for white people. No immigrants. No people of different sexual orientations.

Slusar also threatens that if Linder refuses to remove his hateful hat, she will personally write a letter to the university president, who will then personally have a talk with him.

After the video went viral, Slusar posted a comment online conceding that Linder had a right to wear the hat, no matter how much it made her “diverse friends” feel unsafe:

He is allowed to wear the hat. As a student, I disagree with what the hat represents. I have diverse friends (culturally and sexually) who would drop a class if the person wearing the hat was sitting in the room with them, because they would feel unsafe. Given the deeper issues of intolerance and oppression represented by the hat, I disagree with it….It was impossible to communicate to him why wearing a hat in support of a movement grown on the seeds of racism, bigotry and exclusion of diversity (sexual and cultural) could make some people afraid.

It never seems to have occurred to this self-righteous dingbat that her culturally diverse friends would never have come to Canada in the first place if their ancestral homelands weren’t spectacularly unsafe.

REFUGEES GOAD GERMANS, GERMANS ATTACK
A “mob of 100 neo-Nazis””€”which is newspeak for “100 Germans who think Germany should be for Germans””€”chased and beat down a group of 20 “asylum seekers who goaded them into violence” last Wednesday night in the eastern German town of Bautzen. (Back in February, indigenous residents of Bautzen reportedly cheered as an asylum center was burned to the ground.) German police, who attempted to protect the ethnic invaders, wound up being pelted with rocks and bottles by these freeloading, goat-humping ingrates.

Meanwhile, the culture-smashing busybodies at the United Nations are soiling Germany’s TV airwaves with an ad that shows a blonde-haired German woman wearing a hijab and encouraging other German women to do the same because it’s a “beautiful” celebration of “tolerance” and “difference.”

JAMES WATSON GETS WATSONED AGAIN
Nobel Prize-winning geneticist James Watson had a scheduled September 12 lecture at New York University canceled because a group of students determined that his very existence was offensive. An NYU statement read:

We received the attached letter that had been written by medical and graduate students at NYU School of Medicine to express their feelings regarding the invitation of Dr. Watson for this distinguished lecture. In the letter, the students raised the point that Dr. Watson had made public claims to diminish respect for black, female and obese individuals.

Naturally the university reaffirmed its alleged commitment to “free speech””€”excepting, of course, any speech which offended the “feelings” of blacks, broads, and fatties.

Watson, once considered the world’s preeminent scientist, has forever been banished from polite society for stating what used to be deemed evolutionary common sense in his 2007 book Avoid Boring People:

…there is no firm reason to anticipate that the intellectual capacities of peoples geographically separated in their evolution should prove to have evolved identically. Our wanting to reserve equal powers of reason as some universal heritage of humanity will not be enough to make it so.

In a 2007 interview with the Times of London, Watson told a reporter that he was “€œinherently gloomy about the prospect of Africa”€ because all of “our social policies are based on the fact that their intelligence is the same as ours”€“whereas all the testing says not really.”

Even though Watson’s statement was factually correct, he became”€”and remains”€”a modern Galileo forever ostracized by the intolerant forces of the Cognitive Flat Earth Society.