Relationships

A Dozen Unlikely Assholes

A Dozen Unlikely Assholes

The biggest misconception about so-called “assholes” is that they’re total...

Relationships

The Importance of Hatred

The Importance of Hatred

Commencement speeches often give great advice on how to succeed, whom to befriend, and...

Relationships

How to Find the Perfect Guy

How to Find the Perfect Guy

I walked into a bar yesterday and my neighbor was in tears. Her marriage is over and...

Relationships

How to Tap the Missus

How to Tap the Missus

When I was 13 I was looking at an old Penthouse out behind school and Dale Aiken said,...

Relationships

The Algebra of Divorce

The Algebra of Divorce

I’ve seen too many friends and acquaintances leap into “lightning marriages”—I...

Relationships

Cheating 101

Cheating 101

Dear Delphi, I broke up with my daughter’s mother over a year ago, but I have been...

Relationships

Kid or Career?, Cringing Over Color, and Kicking the Concubine to the Curb

Kid or Career?, Cringing Over Color, and Kicking the Concubine to the Curb

KID OR CAREER? Dear Delphi, I am 36 and am having my first baby, due in December. I...

Relationships

Radar Love, The Elixir of Jealousy, & Panic at the Country Club

Radar Love, The Elixir of Jealousy, & Panic at the Country Club

RADAR LOVE Dear Delphi, My boyfriend keeps saying he needs space, and as a...

Relationships

Swallowing More Than Pride, Happy Old (Possibly Gay) Bachelor, & The Musky Allure of Being Aloof

Swallowing More Than Pride, Happy Old (Possibly Gay) Bachelor, & The Musky Allure of Being Aloof

SWALLOWING MORE THAN PRIDE Dear Delphi, I keep asking all my friends, but I cannot...

Relationships

Curse of the Mega-Sore-Ass, Canine Kevorkian, & She Doesn’t Like You in That Way

Curse of the Mega-Sore-Ass, Canine Kevorkian, & She Doesn’t Like You in That Way

CURSE OF THE MEGA-SORE-ASS Dear Delphi, I was at dinner the other night when my best...

Relationships

God’s Views on Pregnancy, Going Abroad to Leave a Broad, & Baby Talk Among Adults

God’s Views on Pregnancy, Going Abroad to Leave a Broad, & Baby Talk Among Adults

GOD’S VIEWS ON PREGNANCY Dear Delphi, My husband and I have been married since we...

Relationships

Hooters Casino Blues, Lowballing How Many You’ve Balled, and My Brother the Cockblocker

Hooters Casino Blues, Lowballing How Many You’ve Balled, and My Brother the Cockblocker

HOOTERS CASINO BLUES Dear Delphi, My best friend of more than twenty years and I...

Relationships

Fear of an Alpha Female, Afraid of a Spinster Daughter, and Terrified He’ll Never Pop the Question

Fear of an Alpha Female, Afraid of a Spinster Daughter, and Terrified He’ll Never Pop the Question

FEAR OF AN ALPHA FEMALE Dear Delphi, I am a 53-year-old man at the very start of a...

Relationships

No Nudes is Good Nudes, Bird-Dogging Brother, and Tossing Out Used Tarts

NO NUDES IS GOOD NUDES Dear Delphi, I was out and about in London the other day when...

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