Source: Wikimedia Commons

TERROR TRUCKS, REAL AND IMAGINED
The leftist mind inhabits a sick dream world that thrives on delusion and runs screaming from facts.

A group called Latino Victory Fund—who, it must be noted, is not racist even though they are a racial advocacy group, whereas Donald Trump and all his supporters are clearly racist despite the fact that he has never once addressed “white people” by name—says its goal is to build “Latino political power by electing progressive Latino candidates to all levels of government.” Last week they ran a political ad in Virginia showing humble black, brown, and Muslim children being terrorized by a truck-driving redneck hell-bent on running them all down, because, as we all know, that’s something that happens every day.

Then, on Tuesday, a Muslim immigrant from Uzbekistan used a rented Home Depot truck to run over and kill eight pedestrians in Lower Manhattan.

Latino Victory Fund abruptly pulled their truck-terror ad while still insisting that black, brown, and Muslim children coast to coast live in the constant legitimate fear that beer-bellied rednecks are seeking to murder them with trucks. In what is now known as deliberately sculpting a “frontlash,” NBC News focused on the idea that now Muslims—not the people they run over with trucks—will have to live in fear.

THE GAY LIONS OF KENYA
Since homosexuality leads to early death and excessive narcissism, it is illegal in Kenya and 75 other countries.

When two male lions were photographed in the midst of anal intercourse at Kenya’s Maasai Mara game preserve, the head of the nation’s Film Classification Board sought explanations for this horrifying and clearly unacceptable sodomitical act. According to Ezekiel Mutua—who looks like a nice guy—the rump-wranglin’ Kings of the Jungle must have learned to debase themselves and pollute their souls thusly after observing safari tourists “behaving badly,” adding that he doubts the “lion love birds” learned about anal sex from watching movies. He also said the only other possible explanation is that the lions fell victim to demonic possession. Mutua is also demanding hard (see what I did there?) evidence that both lions were male, since such behavior “is not normal.” Mutua recommends that officials “isolate the crazy gay animals” and put them through “counseling.”

It is stories such as this one that prove Africa was, is, and always will be the funniest place on earth.

Every Monday, Jim Goad reads the previous day’s “Week That Perished” on his podcast.