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The Week That Perished

July 30, 2017

IS IT “MANSTRUATION,” OR JUST ANOTHER DELUDED CHICK ON THE RAG?
Powerful Photo Shows That Women Aren’t The Only Ones Who Get Periods,” says a lying-ass Huffington Post headline alongside a picture of a butch female who claims she’s a male sitting spread-eagled on a park bench with a huge bloody stain in the crotch area of her beige pants. “Menstrual health activist” Cass Clemmer, a chick who thinks she’s a dude and gets a lot of hugging and back-patting as a result, insists against all evidence and reason that “Not all people who menstruate are women, and not all women menstruate.”

Clemmer posted the photo on Instragram on July 12, along with a cute poem that included the following lines:

So, the day I got my period, My god, a day so proud, This little andro fucked up kid, Had been bestowed the straight, cis shroud. …. See my body had betrayed me, That red dot, the wax seal, On a contract left there broken, A gender identity that wasn’t real. Most people deal with blood and tissue, And yet my body forces me to surrender, Cause every time I get my cycle, Is another day I shed my gender.

Lady, the only thing you need to shed is the daffy notion that you’re a dude.

SMUGGLED ILLEGALS BAKE TO DEATH INSIDE TRACTOR-TRAILER
Along our nation’s preposterously porous southern border, you can’t even spit without hitting a tractor-trailer stuffed to the gills with tiny brown Mesoamericans yearning to breathe free and work under the table.

Earlier this month, authorities in San Antonio, TX, found a trailer filled with 72 huddled masses on the city’s Southwest Side. Much more gruesomely, on Saturday the 20th, authorities were alerted to a Walmart parking lot in the same area of town after an employee notified them that someone within a parked trailer had begged them for some water. When the trailer was pried open, eight dead bodies were found. Two more people died after being taken to the hospital. It is estimated that when temperatures outside are a mere 80 degrees, the temperature inside an enclosed vehicle can raise to 115 degrees in only a half hour. In San Antonio at 6 PM last Saturday, the temperature outside was 100 degrees. Police arrested 60-year-old James Matthew Bradley, Jr. and charged him with smuggling aliens.

“WEEK THAT PERISHED” TO BE FEATURED ON JIM GOAD PODCAST
For over four years now we have graciously—some would even say lovingly and unselfishly—brought you “The Week That Perished” on this site with crushing regularity. Since May 6, 2013, the only weeks we’ve missed were last week and one week late in 2014—and we never heard the end of it. Starting this week, not only will you be able to read this column every Sunday—you’ll be able to hear it every Monday as Jim Goad reads it aloud and offers meandering commentary in his inimitably buttery voice. New episodes of Jim Goad’s Group Hug are typically posted early on Monday afternoons (EST).

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