The Power of HIV-Positive Thinking

November 23, 2015

Multiple Pages
The Power of HIV-Positive Thinking

Irredeemably dissolute actor Charlie Sheen revealed last week that he tested positive for HIV four years ago. The Mirror alleges that since then, Sheen has “slept with more than 700 [people] including call girls, strippers and porn stars as well as more than a dozen men and transsexuals.” Although Sheen claims he informed every one of his partners that he was infected, one of those partners—ex-porn star Bree Olson—says he’s lying. “I could be dead right now,” Olson says. “He is a monster.”

It is unclear whether Sheen transmitted the virus to any of his partners, but seventy-five or so of them have reportedly contacted lawyers seeking to sue Sheen for negligence.

But hypothetically at least, if he was aware of his infection and proceeded to have unprotected sex with someone who had no clue he was HIV-positive, any resultant transmission of the virus can hardly be seen as accidental. In such a scenario, Sheen would be aware there was a risk. So it could be argued that there was at least a smidge of malicious intent there, however passively it was expressed.

It all makes me nauseous, and this is one of the rare articles where I feel as if I’m typing with one hand and holding a puke bag with the other.

There are multiple documented cases of people purposely infecting others with HIV, which makes me puke just a little bit more into the bag.

“While most people try to avoid acquiring viruses online, these fellas make it their mission.”

But surely one of the sickest, saddest, and most revolting social phenomena of the past, I don’t know, ten thousand years is a small yet virulent sub-community of gay men who actively seek to become infected with HIV. While most people try to avoid acquiring viruses online, these fellas make it their mission.

They are known as “bugchasers.” The men who willingly infect them with HIV, usually straight up the cornhole without a condom and hopefully with a little bit of blood smeared into the spermy fecal mix, are known as “giftgivers.”

Feeling sick yet?

The bugchaser/giftgiver “community” is but a tiny subset of the larger “barebacking” scene of homo dudes who have unprotected sex without the explicit intent of getting infected or infecting someone else. Again, that’s a bit more passive than doing it on purpose, but if you wind up weighing ten pounds and shitting your diapers because you have AIDS, the difference is nearly meaningless.

Some bugchasers say they merely operate from a sort of suicidal impatience and simply want to “empower” themselves by taking their HIV infection into their own hands—to be precise, their own asses—because it’d be a relief to just go ahead and “get it over with” since they’re not going to stop having sex with bajillions of partners anyway. Some say they feel it’d be a relief to actually know you’re HIV-positive than having to, you know, worry about it.

Others eroticize the act of getting infected—or, as they call it, “charged” or “pozzed”—framing it as the ultimate sexual taboo, and who wouldn’t be thrilled by that?

Still others say that by purposely allowing their HIV-positive partners to infect them, they are choosing to enter a quasi-mystical “brotherhood” of gay men, a spiritual fraternity dedicated to fight a hatefully straight society that stigmatizes and is bigoted against the act of infecting yourself with a fatal disease by asking someone to squirt his HIV-positive cum up your rectum. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face!

Finally, there are those who frame it as the gay version of reproducing. They refer to it as “breeding,” getting “knocked up,” or even being “impregnated.”

Back in a sec. Have to vomit again….

If you think I’m making this up, have yourself a gander at, this academic paper on the phenomenon, or the Twitter account of Poz Man, who hasn’t tweeted since 2012, possibly because he finally dropped dead from AIDS.

Or, if you have the stomach for it, you can watch the hour-long 2003 documentary The Gift, which follows a naïve young gaybird both before and after his infection. Spoiler alert: He regrets it. A LOT. It’s ultra-grim.

With all the saccharine pro-gay propaganda one sees in academia and popular culture these days, this is one hue of the rainbow you don’t see a lot. Pretty much everything you see about gay people these days is wholesome and clean and normalized. It’s the ones who say anything bad about gays who are seen as the twisted perverts.

Around one in five adult gay men in America is HIV-positive. Pooling various sources and removing intravenous drug users from the equation, I crunched the numbers and found that only about one in 780 heterosexual men is HIV-positive.

Gay American men are around five times more likely to have attempted suicide than straight men. A similar ratio applies to gay and lesbian teens compared to their straight schoolmates.

There’s also the longevity gap. Study after study confirms that homosexuals die anywhere from eight to twenty years sooner than heterosexuals.

And let’s not even mention that adult homosexuals report having been molested as children at rates far exceeding heterosexuals, because everyone knows that homosexuality is genetic and to imply anything else would be homophobic.

The Narrative dictates that homosexuality is healthy and happy and natural and antiseptic and is not in any way intricately woven with shame and self-loathing and death. And hey, even if they do die much younger, it’s society’s fault and has nothing to do with their own decisions. If they feel such tremendous shame that they do things that shorten their lives by a decade or more, this shame was imposed on them and can’t possibly be in any way related to negative feelings they may naturally harbor toward themselves.

But we really shouldn’t be talking about any of this, because we live in an era where to state facts is to stigmatize. And I’m not sure stigmatization is necessary when you’re dealing with a small group of severely disturbed humans on a sick mission to inflict themselves with a fatal stigmata.

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