June 25, 2018

Word has it that tiny brown children are screaming at our southern border, but you probably can’t hear them because too many other people—in most cases, much paler and larger people—are drowning them out by screaming even louder about how evil the whole rotten situation is.

Mind you, public outrage on social media is the easiest and most risk-free way to prove to the world that you’re a good person without actually having to help anyone. This is why so many sit at their keyboards in Dubuque waxing wroth about hunger in Africa but so few seem willing to send the poor rail-thin bastards so much as a hoagie.

If you’re going to step up on a digital soapbox and complain about a situation without doing anything of substance to fix the situation, I will immediately suspect that you are more concerned with appearing to be good than actually doing anything good. If I were a dictator, empty public displays of virtue-signaling would be a capital crime. This is probably why it’s good that I’m not a dictator, because most people with social media accounts would be dead under my regime.

Just when you think the modern left can’t get more hysterical, they mainline another 100CC of estrogen and prove you wrong. Last week I was jolted out of my daily ablutions by deliberately shocking news that the Evil Demon Monster Donald Trump was “ripping” and “tearing”—they actually used those words, as if they were talking about abortions or something—innocent tiny brown children from their innocent tiny brown parents at our evil white border with Mexico, a nation that is so great it seems that everyone wants to flee it.


Since losing the White House the left has behaved like a mother with postpartum psychosis, so nearly all of their appointed mouthpieces these days sound roughly as stable as a mother who’s ready to drive her kids into a lake. But Peter Fonda—he did a movie back in 1969, remember him?—won the prize last week for unhinged malice masquerading as compassion, of sadism cowering behind a fake-ass shield of “justice”:

WE SHOULD RIP BARRON TRUMP FROM HIS MOTHER’S ARMS AND PUT HIM IN A CAGE WITH PEDOPHILES AND SEE IF HIS MOTHER WILL STAND UP AGAINST THE GIANT ASSHOLE SHE IS MARRIED TO. 90 MILLION PEOPLE IN THE STREETS ON THE SAME WEEKEND IN THE COUNTRY. FUCK

“If the competition truly is about caring, it appears that Trump cares about Americans more than about illegal aliens.”

OK, restrain your Clydesdales just a wee minute there, Captain America. Are you implying that a substantial quotient of the humble migrants streaming northward into our nation like tiny brown indistinguishable ants are pedophiles? All Trump did was say that many of them are rapists. Isn’t it even worse to be a pedophile?

Other leftist “activists,” blind to their ridiculous hyperbole as is their wont, likened the situation to slavery and the Holocaust. They were slamming Trump as a “child-snatcher” and “baby-killer” and someone who breaks up families. Since when did leftists care about breaking up families? That’s their MAIN GOAL. It’s rancidly ironic to watch the same sad crew who livestream their abortions on Facebook suddenly bawling crocodile tears about two-year-olds they will never have to meet, feed, nor raise.

Rachel Maddow—a horse-faced sapphite who is rumored to have a womb although it is doomed to be barren until it is laid in a tomb—actually cried tears on camera to prove that she cared about these pre-K brown children whose parents dragged them on thousand-mile rape journeys with coyotes under conditions that were highly treacherous and dangerous UNTIL the moment they crossed the American border.

Never mind that according to most estimates, over 80% of the children who cross the southern border do so with strangers that aren’t their parents. Pay no heed to the fact that this means the main people “pulling families apart” are the families themselves.

This was all illustrated beautifully last week after TIME magazine released an instantly iconic Photoshopped image of Big Mean Trump staring down at a screaming two-year-old Token Brown Girl with the headline “Welcome to America.”

I have to tell you—if America is as bad as TIME magazine implies, why the hell do all these innocent brown people want to come here? What, are they masochists or something?

That magazine cover was pivotal in helping stoke the volcanic eruption of Social Justice PMS that afflicted much of the nation last week.

Suddenly to these mush-brained zombies, it was irrefutably clear that Trump DIDN’T CARE about these babies and THEY CARED and that if you DIDN’T CARE like they did, you were a subhuman monster who deserved neutering and torture.

I’m not sure whether you’ve noticed, but the overwhelming percentage of online “discourse” these days is nothing loftier than grown men and women acting like schoolchildren in their bloody competition to out-care each other. Forget about policy and numbers and reason and what will work and what won’t. It’s all about whether you have a heart, and if you don’t, well, you should probably be hit with a shovel.

Although it wasn’t directly stated, the TIME cover was read by many to imply that Trump had brutally ripped this child abortion-like from its mother’s side and was ready to send her into a tiny dog kennel where she’d scream to the delight of ICE officials.

In reality, the girl was never separated from her mother, whom TIME had conveniently airbrushed out of the original photo. The mom, 32-year-old Honduran native Sandra Sanchez, had previously been deported in 2013. The first offense had been a misdemeanor, but reentering the USA after deportation is a felony. So she was dragging her two-year-old daughter along in the midst of purposely committing a felony. And when she left Honduras in early June with her two-year-old daughter, Sanchez split up her family, leaving her husband and three other children behind—and according to her husband, she didn’t even say goodbye. Denis Sanchez says that when he saw the image of his screaming daughter in the news, it broke his heart since he hadn’t seen nor heard from her in nearly a month.

Columnists

Sign Up to Receive Our Latest Updates!