New York. I missed a very good friend’s sixtieth birthday party in the shires, but thus avoided the disgraceful anti- Pontiff showing off by the cheap publicity seeking and repellent poseurs that signed up to the orchestrated campaign against the wonderful Pope Benedict. Mind you, all these grotesque losers have a point, against God, that is. If I looked like Polly Toynbee or Claire Rayner, or Stephen Fry for that matter, I too might be writing letters of protest to the Guardian. The fact that the Catholic Church’s key message is to love thy neighbor and help the poor, that the church’s moral code built our great societies, and that the church is the last bulwark against secularism and destruction seems to have escaped these catamites. They need publicity a-la-Paris Hilton, and they’ll do anything to get it. But not against anyone who might retaliate. The far more anti-gay and misogynistic Islamic religion is off bounds to them because Islam does not take any crap. This is why I loathe them as much as I do. They are the worst cowards I know. Not a word about Zuma or Zardari coming to town to see the Queen, but only his Holiness.

The one I liked the best was the German Cardinal who told a magazine that when one lands at Heathrow one thinks they’ve arrived in a Third World country. What is wrong with that remark, I’d like to know. One feels exactly the same landing in Paris or New York. The white man is a rarity, almost forbidden fruit. Why can’t a man tell the truth without all hell breaking loose?  After all, the Catholic religion is far more popular in Africa than in Godless Europe, so what’s wrong with saying it out loud. The Cardinal was expressing joy. And speaking of the Bagel, politeness seems to have been eradicated in the city, like smallpox. Noo Yawkers have little need for politeness and refinement nowadays. In fact the quality of life seems once again to be heading south, led by a megalomaniacal incompetent midget as mayor, who is now pushing through legislation to stop smoking in public areas outdoors. At the same time Bloomberg refuses to strictly apply a law that forbids people to idle their engine for hours on end, a far greater pollutant and energy waster, yet lectures us on the evils of nicotine outdoors. Never have I seen a greater hypocrite and clown than Bloomberg, he really should join his fellow phonies in London where he keeps a flat, incidentally.

Otherwise everything is honky dory, except for the informality around the Bagel. What I’ve noticed is that the word gentlemen is no longer used, having been replaced by “you guys.” “You guys ready to order?” All humankind is now referred to as guys.  When I was in boarding school during the Fifties, one used the word almost pejoratively. Like “who the hell are these guys?” Addressing two older ladies, or two young ones for that matter, as you guys I find offensive. Such informality too often creates an undignified situation, as when I went to a gentleman’s club a couple of years ago, asked for someone, and the hall porter announced to my host that there’s a guy down here to see you.  My father first heard the word during the Forties, and thought he was being called a ghost, because in German the words are similar.